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Saturday, October 25, 2014 | Last updated: 3:13am

States filing secession petitions need to grow up



In response to the re-election of President Barack Obama, some people took to the Internet to vent. Some folks declared they would leave the country.

Now, the hip new disappointment tactic is to petition to secede from the union.

The secession movement stems from Texas, where an online petition to secede has more than 93,000 signatures as of Nov. 14 on WhiteHouse.gov.

According to ABCNews, the White House said it will review petitions that collect more than 25,000 signatures in 30 days, like the petition from Texas.

The Obama administration created the “We the People” website in 2011 so that Americans could easily petition for the redress of grievances. So naturally, people in more than 35 states have started petitions to free their states of the now socialist government of America. Arizona is one of them.

Let’s take a moment to think about what the world would be like if Arizona seceded: First of all, Jan Brewer would be the president.

Welcome back to the union.

Secession isn’t exactly new to Arizona. In 2011, people in Tucson wanted to secede from the state of Arizona to create Baja Arizona. They were driven to make the move because they were tired of the Republican policies of the state, specifically ones that defied the power of the federal government.

Though less far-fetched, because secession from states has happened before without resulting in war (see Maine from Massachusetts and West Virginia from Virginia), the idea was just as ridiculous as current attempts to secede from the union.

It was as though people thought that once Obama was re-elected, the country would turn into an apocalyptic state, where those gay folks getting married would forever destroy straight marriage and all the poor people would knock on the rich people’s doors for free money, as if every day were grown-up Halloween.

But people are forgetting a pretty important fact: Obama has already been in office for four years. Things aren’t going to start going to hell because he has another four years. In fact, things are probably going to get better.

You know that whole economy thing people are worried about? Prior to the election, a Slate magazine analysis predicted that by maintaining current trends, 7.8 million new jobs would be created, regardless of who won the election. And financial experts predicted that, with some improvements, there will be around 12 million new jobs created.

And you know that universal health care thing everyone is freaking out about? The majority of democratic countries around the world have that. Want to move to Canada? England? Spain? Australia? All of those countries have the same universal health care that you’re so angry about.

It’s time to come out of your toddler years, and stop throwing a hissy fit every time something doesn’t go your way. Secede from the union? That’s bullshit. We don’t need to be even more divided right now.

Sure, maybe it’s the crazy people that actually think about seceding, but we need to cut those crazy people out of the conversation.

Let people who want to secede leave the country to form a new one. They can move to a tropical island and call it Idiotsland. I’ll make sure to never visit.

— Dan Desrochers is a pre-journalism sophomore. He can be reached at letters@wildcat.arizona.edu or on Twitter via @drdesrochers .


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