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Monday, September 22, 2014 | Last updated: 1:14am

Don't be 'that' dude: a guide to live music etiquette



Live music can be one of the most noteworthy experiences of someone’s month, year or even their life. A great live act can change everything for a musician, inspiring a person to better his or her craft and creating diehard fans out of the most jaded music critics.

But like most great things in life, a few ignorant individuals can ruin everything with their missteps. If you’re a seasoned music enthusiast, you can immediately recall such actions by drunk patrons. For those who have never seen live music, which is a frighteningly high number of people, then take caution and avoid being the dude that gets kicked out of the show.

With upcoming acts like MURS at Club Congress tonight, Ed Sheeran at the Rialto Theatre next Thursday and the xx at the Rialto next Sunday, remind yourself of proper concert etiquette.

Leave the iPad at home
While pulling out your iPhone to send a 30-second jealousy-inducing clip to all of your friends is fine, there are actually people who bring their tablets to shows with the sole intention to record video. Remember, folks: Your iPad’s video recording resolution is actually less compared to that of your iPhone 5, and both offer 1080p video recording. The real difference between the two? The guy standing behind you isn’t going to take the iPhone out of your hands and beat you with it.

Keep your drinks off of amps, subwoofers and the stage
This will likely get you reprimanded or, at most places, you will simply have your drink thrown away. Especially at a small venue like Club Congress, where you can literally stand at the band members’ feet as they play, just keep your draft beer in your hand.

If you set it down because you really, really need to dance, then just down it. Any inconsiderate douche who spills a plastic cup of PBR on a guitarist’s pedal board should be kicked in the face.

If you’re a tall guy, let the ladies stand in front
This has happened before, and it’s enough of a reason to think that chivalry is dead. Listen, bro, I know you paid good money to see the xx, and you just want to “vibe out” on Romy Madley-Croft and Jamie Smith’s stripped-down British emo-pop, but you’re like 7 feet tall and that girl behind you can’t see a damn thing.

At the Rialto, this is less of an issue thanks to the sloped flooring that gives everyone standing a relatively solid view of the stage, but at Club Congress, it’s a different story. Be polite and let the fairer sex through. If you’re a short dude, then get there early — this doesn’t apply to you as much.

Don’t yell “Free Bird” or hold up a lighter. It’s not the ‘80s
“Free Bird” isn’t funny. It wasn’t funny then, it’s not funny now and it will never be funny in the future. Unless the singer asks the crowd to hold up lighters in a tribute to Stevie Ray Vaughan or Ol’ Dirty Bastard, don’t do that either. If the guy next to you has already yelled “Free Bird” more than three times halfway through the set, then you may use your lighter to set him on fire. Everyone else will thank you.


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